Go Blurry

It was sometime after I moved into my apartment that I discovered the world of blogs.  It probably happened during that month that I lived alone for the first time ever… I spent enough time on the internet I got hooked on several different ones.  One thing I noticed was that everyone had awesome photography, it just seemed like if you had a blog, you had great pictures.  and I loved them. I especially loved the blurry background look… oh how I loved it.  So then one day I read a tutorial on how to achieve that look, and I realized it involved a big camera.  I decided to get one, did a couple weeks of research, and last June I bought my Canon Rebel.  Later on I bought my 50mm lens because it got an even shallower depth of field.  I took a couple of photography classes so I could figure out what depth of field is, and now I love it all the more.

These are senior pics I took for one of my friends that graduated a couple of weeks ago. We went and hung out at the park on Monday, until my battery died.  A second battery is now on my shopping list.

I love how the trees just blend all together

how she can be in focus with everything behind her just  a tad softer.

and to change directions a bit… I love taking flower pics where they fade out.

and I love the thought of taking clear images of K-State beads while making KU go blurry.  Just saying… I’m a purple kind of girl.

And I love this kid.  Which really has nothing to do with anything, but still.

There you have it… my You Capture for this week. 

Taking pictures I like of a color I don’t

The challenge this week was to take pictures of yellow.  I am not a huge fan of yellow, more of a green, blue, and purple person.  I wasn’t expecting to get much that I like with yellow… I was wrong.  

Things I like:

1. Colorful flowers set off by yellow centers/yellow flowers in the bouquet.

2.  Taking pictures with the new macro filters I got for my 50mm. 

 

3. I don’t know what these are… some sort of corn cob flower? I think they are fascinating. and weird

4. I like the fact that my mom said my coming home for mother’s day (and taking pictures of all the flowers everyone but me got her…) was enough of a present.

5.  I like old, closed, train stations full of old memorabilia that I find while wandering around my home town.  

Next time I am going to climb over the fence and get closer.

I am super excited about next week’s challenge, Depth of Field.  Seeing as how I bought my DSLR for the express purpose of getting blurry backgrounds, it will be fun to see what everyone comes up with.

Part of You Capture

Life

It hasn’t gone as planned the past few days.  I was all set to write a big 2 year post, and then life happened.  Yesterday I walked in a 5 k.  My friend and I did it in 44.56 minutes, which means a 14.24 minute mile, or something like that.   Afterwards I was able to go home.  It was a last minute thing, but my grandparents were visiting my parents so I drove 2 hours to hang out for a couple of hours.  Right after that set of grandparents left, my grandpa T called to say that they were rushing my grandma to the ER. 

I hate end-stage COPD. 

She is okay, just some difficulty breathing and a rapid heart rate.  Some extra oxygen, breathing treatments and she was good to go, but still.

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It has been a hard spring for lungs.  I don’t know if it is the pollen count, the colder than normal temperatures, or what, but our frequent flyers have been in more frequently and for longer times, we have had several middle-age women with asthma coming in, people who have never required anything more than a rescue inhaler.  Even though my area never got hit hard with the flu, seasonal or h1n1, it still has seemed hard.

I have had the opportunity to spend time with lots of family members as they make the choice for hospice.  There is something really hard, but also very “nursey”(I can’t think of the perfect word for this. empowering? inspiring? touching?) about sitting with a family and explaining how their loved one was going to die.   They needed to know.  They needed me to explain.  They needed the knowledge to help the person they love die in peace.  Sometimes helping the family help the patient is what nursing is all about.

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Funny story:  the nurses in the ED seemed really nice (that isn’t the funny part.) so they kept coming in and checking vitals, giving breathing treatments, starting IVs.  As they worked, grandma kept asking me questions.  “what kind of medicine is this?  how long is it going to last"? why do I need an IV?  can I have coffee?”  As she asked, clearly looking at me, the nurses/rt techs would answer.  She would then look at me to verify.  As soon as they left we had to repeat the conversation, with me saying the same thing they had already said. 

I truly am her nurse.

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In other news, I now I have an active Alaska license. 

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Life is random.

For Randi and Rachel

Happy Nurses Week to all my fellow nurses out there!

This was my first time celebrating it as an actual RN and I was blessed to be nominated as the "Rookie Nurse of the Year" at my hospital and I won! The ceremony was beautiful and I had no idea I had won til I got there. My boss called my parents and they were able to come and share this special moment with me. I actually got 4 free tickets to Disney world too!



I had a very boring three day weekend at work last week. Nothing happened and I was hounding the doctors for stuff to do and annoying my fellow nurses with constantly asking them if they needed help. So yesterday I had to pay for all my boredness. I had a 44 year old woman come in as a diabetic unresponsiveness but that was actually the least of her problems. She had liver cancer and her prognosis was very poor, her oncologist had told her already that there was nothing that could be done for her. She was a train wreck, all her systems were already shutting down. Her lungs were filling up with fluid, her abdomen was distended with what the ED doctor thought was blood because her hemoglobin was half that of a healthy person. She wouldn't keep her blood pressure up, her kidneys weren't working and although she was conscious, she was confused and unresponsive to everything going on around her. Her core temperature was only 91 degrees.

She was going to die. I knew it, the other nurses knew it, and the doctors knew it but her sisters wouldn't accept it.

Liver Cancer runs in their family, one of the sisters had already had a liver transplant. I don't know if they thought this one sister could survive the cancer because the other sister already had or what. Either they didn't understand how grave my patients situation was or they just didn't want to accept it but they told us that they wanted everything done for this poor woman.

EVERYTHING.

I let the two sisters stay in the room because I knew they didn't have much more time together. I had to work to keep my mind busy on all the interventions I was doing like foley catheter, NG tube, and managing all 5 of the IV pumps, because every time I let myself focus on the three woman in the room with me, I would tear up because they reminded me of myself and my beautiful sisters. The nurse in me was incredulous that these women would allow my poor patient to suffer like she was but at the same time, the sister in me could understand because I am sure I wouldn't want to let go of one of my sisters at such a young age.

I stabilized her as much as I possibly could and had my charge nurse help me transport her to the ICU. We were a very grave procession going down the hall followed by the chaplain, the sisters, and the rest of the family. They coded her 3 times in the ICU, the second time was right at shift change and since I didn't have any patients, I went up with the ED doctor to work it. I found out from the ICU nurses that the patient hadn't wanted all of this...she didn't want the tube down her throat or her heart being shocked back into rhythm. But family members can overrule the patient's wishes. Finally, after she coded for the fourth time, her family signed the DNR and let her go.

When I got home last night, I just wanted to hug my sisters. Being the young age that I am, I still have that immortal mentality that hard things will never happen to me. Days like this show me that I don't know what the future will hold for me and my family. I hope that if I ever find myself in a similar situation I will make the right choice. But I won't know what the right choice will be until I get there. So for now, I won't yell at Randi Jean when she steals my perfume or say no to Rachel when she asks me to ride bikes with her. God truly blessed me when he linked me for life with these two women(oh my word, I'm crying right now!). I pray that I will always cherish them for as long as I am privileged to have them.













2004


2009

She is your mirror, shining back at you with a world of possibilities. She is your witness, who sees you at your worst and best, and loves you anyway. She is your partner in crime, your midnight companion, someone who knows when you are smiling, even in the dark. She is your teacher, your defense attorney, your personal press agent, even your shrink. Some days, she's the reason you wish you were an only child.
~Barbara Alpert

The best weekend in spring...

Spring. For the longest time spring was the end of the school year... the time before summer break... the time before graduation. And though I graduated 2 years ago, the "slow" ones of my my group of freshman graduated this past weekend, and the best weekend of spring commenced. I love graduation... I loved my graduation. I love the ceremony the singing of the alma mater. I especially loved this year, because it was the first time the group had been together in quite a while. 4 nights in a row we had parties, late night ihop runs, cake, and many many games. It was a good weekend.

Green won

This might be my favorite picture ever. I so love those girls...

The memories that come from walking around my campus... I walked up that sidewalk towards the library twice a day for 3 years.

Class of 20008! I have a brick! (I remember ordering the brick... but I didn't think I had one because I don't remember actually sending in the check to pay for the brick.)

Is it bad to want a master's degree so I can wear the colorful hood?

It was a very good, very needed weekend.
I am so loving this spring.
(part of You Capture: Spring again. all pictures SOOC thanks to the fact that my computer got wiped clean when windows 7 got uploaded this week and I haven't gotten around to putting photoshop back on. Sigh. I sometimes hate computers.)