Today I went to the movies and watched Julie & Julia and was inspired to once again do my part and contribute to A tale of Two Nurses.
Hi--Longtime no see :D
I feel like a different person since the last time we have spoken. I have been through the ringer so to speak and emerged a little damaged and a lot changed. For the better I hope. Oh where to begin...the last time I blogged I was trying to keep from freaking out over a dirty needle stick.
Clinically I am still a spastic nurse...I recently attempted to bleed a patient out one of her anticubital veins because I started her IV without properly preparing my supplies and when I scored a superb vein, I was unable to staunch the flow and had to call in reinforcements to help me unwrap my supplies and cap the the IV catheter. The patients daughter was on the verge of freaking out. I was mortified. And about a week ago I forgot to take the tourniquet off my patient's arm after drawing blood. The tourniquet was found by the paramedic who wrote on it "No circulation is a great thing!!! RaDonna!! Ha ha ha!!!" I was humiliated!!! But I learned 2 valuable lessons that I won't soon forget.
Educationally I am now Trauma Nurse Core Course Certified and Emergency Nurse Pediatric Course Certified which means I will better be able to care for my patients in crisis situations and I will also be more marketable in the likely event I don't stay at my current hospital for the rest of my life. And as of Tuesday I will be a University student! I am going straight back to school for BSN because knowing me if I lose momentum now I won't ever go back. I will also be taking College Chemistry which is the the only class to ever kick my butt so I am going back for more! Wish me luck because it is making me nervous.
Emotionally I am doing pretty horribly. A week ago today I broke up with boyfriend of nearly two years. Irreconcilable differences I suppose would be the technical reason...we just started sucking at being together and decided to call it quits. We are trying the friend route which I really hope works out well because not only was he my boyfriend he was also my best friend and he knows me better than anyone. So we'll see where this goes. I am filling my newly found time with lots of sleeping, lots of Call of Duty 4, some crying and a bit of self-loathing and pity. But I am doing my best to keep my spirits up and look on the bright side...I can now wear high-heels and will be able to focus more on my school this fall. People say that breaking up is hard to do and I think that is a serious understatement. I actually feel like I am walking around with a gaping hole in my chest and nothing that anyone says or does will make it better. But I will be ok, I will emerge a better and more complete person, it will just take time.
That is all for tonight...I am typed out for the present...
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Monday, August 17, 2009
Mental health and all that...
I am off for a week again. I get these long breaks every three weeks. This time is longer than normal because I took Wednesday off. I took call. The beautiful thing of the census being 14 patients less than what we are staffed for, for over a month running now, is that you can put yourself on call and no one cares. Actually they think it is a good thing, because it is one less nurse to call and beg not to work. (side note= I would not like staffing job... getting turned down all the time. people are also talking about mandatory canceling. I wonder if that is allowed.)
Anyway, I called it my mental health day. I needed it. I could have gone to work. I would have given okay care. Not excellent care though, which is why I didn't go. Do you ever feel so tired your brain can't focus? Honestly, my eyes wouldn't focus on the computer screen. My brain was a sludge. I could not think. I wasn't sleeping well, because I had switched back and forth so many times from day to night that my brain couldn't figure out when it was supposed to shut down. I woke up more tired than when I went to bed. Over the last 4 days I have slept probably about the same amount of time I have been awake. That is probably not normal, but it has felt good and my brain is actually functioning again. That has to be a good thing. Going for a month with either work or something major planned every day is not conduicive to my well being. I will remember that in the future.
Today I bought two new books on amazon... books to help me prepare for my PCCN certificiation. RaDonna has motivated me. I don't even know what all she has done since she graduated but it is definetly more than me. Time for catch up.
I went to the wound care meeting this past week. We are getting some new products I am excited about. I really like being involved, one of the first to hear about the new things.
Life is good.
Anyway, I called it my mental health day. I needed it. I could have gone to work. I would have given okay care. Not excellent care though, which is why I didn't go. Do you ever feel so tired your brain can't focus? Honestly, my eyes wouldn't focus on the computer screen. My brain was a sludge. I could not think. I wasn't sleeping well, because I had switched back and forth so many times from day to night that my brain couldn't figure out when it was supposed to shut down. I woke up more tired than when I went to bed. Over the last 4 days I have slept probably about the same amount of time I have been awake. That is probably not normal, but it has felt good and my brain is actually functioning again. That has to be a good thing. Going for a month with either work or something major planned every day is not conduicive to my well being. I will remember that in the future.
Today I bought two new books on amazon... books to help me prepare for my PCCN certificiation. RaDonna has motivated me. I don't even know what all she has done since she graduated but it is definetly more than me. Time for catch up.
I went to the wound care meeting this past week. We are getting some new products I am excited about. I really like being involved, one of the first to hear about the new things.
Life is good.
Thursday, August 6, 2009
MY HAIR IS GREEN!!!
Well, not really. It is red, rather bright. Sometimes curly. always frizzy.
When I was little I hated my red hair. Probably due to the fact that everyone made a big deal about it, probably because I was the only person in my family to have red hair. All my uncles/brother/dad have dark brown hair, and red beards. That is me, I match their beards. When I was five I had the eye doctor convinced I was color blind because I insisted that my hair was GREEN, not red. My grandpa still comments on my green hair.
Today I read 2 articles about redheads. My grandma sent me one, and I found one in the new york times health blog. Redheads make up only 2% of the population. It is a recessive gene, so both parents have to have it (I have been at family reunions for both sides of the family... tons of people and I am still the only redhead). Our pigment clings to the hair follicle tightly, which is why it is very hard to dye red hair. I should know, I have tried to go brown twice, and not even my mom noticed.
Of course, it is also the most asked for color in hair salons, and it is the hardest to achieve. Normally you can tell the difference between a natural and a not.
What I found interesting about the second article in the New York Times is that there is now evidence that redheads are resistant to anesthesia, which means in procedures if we are given the amount of meds normal patients are given it is less effective. We hurt more at the dentist because Novocain is not as strong in our system. I have also read, not today, that redheads bleed more. Combine with bleeding more and hurting more, Doctors are told to keep an especially close eye on us when we are giving birth, as we are more inclined for complications.
Oh joy.
I find genetics fascinating. I have heard of patients refuse medications because it is a blood pressure med designed specifically for African Americans. There is no difference, I am trying to discriminate, give me the stuff you give everyone else. Yet it is proven to be more effective. The way the body works, and is formed, is amazing. The fact that we have the technology and knowledge to find out how people are wired different and give them different treatments, incredible,
And trust me, I will have no problem using my hair color as an excuse for more pain meds if I ever need too.
(just found another article about how we need more general anesthesia as well.
When I was little I hated my red hair. Probably due to the fact that everyone made a big deal about it, probably because I was the only person in my family to have red hair. All my uncles/brother/dad have dark brown hair, and red beards. That is me, I match their beards. When I was five I had the eye doctor convinced I was color blind because I insisted that my hair was GREEN, not red. My grandpa still comments on my green hair.
Today I read 2 articles about redheads. My grandma sent me one, and I found one in the new york times health blog. Redheads make up only 2% of the population. It is a recessive gene, so both parents have to have it (I have been at family reunions for both sides of the family... tons of people and I am still the only redhead). Our pigment clings to the hair follicle tightly, which is why it is very hard to dye red hair. I should know, I have tried to go brown twice, and not even my mom noticed.
Of course, it is also the most asked for color in hair salons, and it is the hardest to achieve. Normally you can tell the difference between a natural and a not.
What I found interesting about the second article in the New York Times is that there is now evidence that redheads are resistant to anesthesia, which means in procedures if we are given the amount of meds normal patients are given it is less effective. We hurt more at the dentist because Novocain is not as strong in our system. I have also read, not today, that redheads bleed more. Combine with bleeding more and hurting more, Doctors are told to keep an especially close eye on us when we are giving birth, as we are more inclined for complications.
Oh joy.
I find genetics fascinating. I have heard of patients refuse medications because it is a blood pressure med designed specifically for African Americans. There is no difference, I am trying to discriminate, give me the stuff you give everyone else. Yet it is proven to be more effective. The way the body works, and is formed, is amazing. The fact that we have the technology and knowledge to find out how people are wired different and give them different treatments, incredible,
And trust me, I will have no problem using my hair color as an excuse for more pain meds if I ever need too.
(just found another article about how we need more general anesthesia as well.
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